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280 days ago
Ever heard of contrition? No, neither had I until after I had reached the very depths of my existence. I had come to a point in my life where it was time to die or time to start living. Now that would be a pretty simple choice for some, either way; for me it was somewhat more difficult. In my mind I was being given the choice to die and save the lives of all my loved ones, or, live and face a very nasty demise at the hands of some very professional evil people. All of this was in my mind of course, or that’s what the medical people told me. I chose to fight for life and face the consequences; I had no idea what lay in store for me. I had already been through a certain paranoia whereby every picture, every sign spoke directly to me. That was true fear I felt, the essence of fear is when you believe you are being hunted down by unknown attackers and you run for your life. When the running stops because you can run no-more, a feeling of abject acceptance takes over; you no longer care ...
