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293 days ago
It’s been such a long time since I have written and so many changes have occurred. Since starting school, my life has been really busy and my spare time has been schoolwork as I am working really hard to keep a close 4.0. Anyway, time has been the issue, it just doesn’t seem there are enough hours in any given day to get what I want accomplished. Then a couple of weeks ago I found that my job that I have had for the last two and half years of my life was going to be eliminated. So this past week was my first week off of work. It’s tough as the job market is very bleak and I am single with a mortgage and other debt as well; although I have responsibilities I am not the only one that is in this exact same place and I feel some are in worse situations than me. I cannot change that I was laid off nor can I just make a job happen but I can hang onto the hope that there is something much better out there as well as keep my faith that God truly has a plan for me. I haven’t lost sight ...
366 days ago
I think sometimes in life things seem really easy and other times life just seems to continually challenge us. Many years ago I thought I knew exactly what I wanted out of life, now it seems to change daily. The only constant that I do know is the fact that I lost something so great yet that greatness gave me my life back. It gave me back my identity and has lead me to a whole new discovery of myself. Some of the things have been scary; some have been great and some of those discoveries have changed the way I will think and will be for the rest of my life. I got divorced two years ago and it was final right around this time. At the time I was a mess, I wasn’t sure which way was left, right, up or down. My greatest loss was my mantra, it wasn’t my marriage I lost but something even greater, something I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy, yet that loss has given me strength, great hope and has made my faith so much stronger. That loss in a sense saved me. Shortly after my ...
390 days ago
Have you ever wanted something so badly that you almost can taste it? I have this “thing” that I want so badly, more than anything than I have wanted in a really long time. It has nothing to do with a person, except for me being who it involves. You see, I’ve been trying to better myself, since I have bought my town home I’ve struggled; it’s been a huge financial responsibility. So far I’ve been okay, it seems whenever I don’t think I am going to have enough money or I’m wondering how I’m going to get to the next month with paying everything on time, I have somehow and the money has just shown up or I’ve had overtime at work to suffice. Well, things have changed at work; we laid 5 people off on Friday, so I’m nervous, there is no overtime and hasn’t been for awhile. My parents have offered to help me out but I made this choice so I have to figure it out on my own. I’ve applied at quite a few places for waitressing but I haven’t waitressed since I was 15, so the experience I have ...
401 days ago
Lately my life has been really busy. There has been the normal of work and school and of course dating here and there, then there’s been the church I have been going to for the last couple of months. Every time I go I come away wanting more. This church amazes me, people are so non judgmental and I thoroughly enjoy going and am disappointed when the service ends. Last Sunday, I sat where I normally do and this couple sat down beside me, after the service they were asking me how long I had been going and we started chatting. Somehow we got on the topic that I am going to college as well as working; I also shared a few tidbits of my past. Then the pastor came over and somehow the man that was part of the couple told the pastor of some of the things I have gone through. Well one thing lead to another and he asked if I would ever be interested in sharing my Faith Story, I said I would. So I get an email from the assistant pastor and this Sunday I am sharing my Faith Story with ...
404 days ago
My Dearest Angel Baby, Six years ago you changed my life, you made me realize life wasn’t just about me and there was something more important that I was meant to do. I know I only knew you for a few short weeks, but I want you to know that those weeks I remember as though it was just yesterday. I still imagine what it was like to have you grow in my tummy. You see Angel Baby, I loved you more than anything and I miss you more than you will ever know. At times it seems like I just imagined you and other times I know that I knew you and you knew me, your mommy. I loved you then and I still love you. I still think of you and I still wonder what you would be like. You would be six this year, how did those years slip by? It seems like it was only yesterday when I was first introduced to you. I remember the moment that I found out I was pregnant with you and how elated I felt, there are no words to accurately describe just how happy the thought of you made me. I had all of these hopes ...
